I watched a programme one evening this week called “Before I kick the bucket”. It’s about Rowena Kincaid, who has stage 4 breast cancer. She’s single and 39 years old. The documentary examines the concept of having a “bucket list” and how the issue is forced when, at such a young age, Rowena discovers she has only months to live. It was a thought-provoking documentary, made by a courageous and spirited woman.
We’ve all heard of a Bucket List: Described by Google as “A number of experiences or achievements that a person hopes to have or accomplish during their lifetime.”
Here are the conclusions made by Rowena, me and a couple of wise women, on why we think you should KICK your bucket list!
1 – Nobody in this World will ever be able to do/see/experience everything, so choose what’s really important to YOU, rather than all those things you have convinced yourself you should do, because someone else said so.
Stop comparing your life with other people’s lives. Just get on with living your life though the lens of your own values.
2 – Quality beats quantity when it comes to experiences.
Have you ever seen Japanese tourists on a whirlwind tour of Europe? I often notice them in Grasmere, perhaps the most famous village in the Lake District (it was William Wordsworth’s home). These hapless tourists never get the chance to walk up the fells and soak in the amazing views above Grasmere. Instead they are herded on and off coaches to speed off to the next place. Whilst they are ticking off plenty of places on their itinerary, they never get to fully experience the beauty and wonder of those places.
3 – People who are dying invariably regret the people they didn’t spend time with far more than the experiences they missed.
Life is about people and love rather than things or even experiences. I remember a coaching exercise I did some years ago. The idea is that you ask yourself a series of questions:
“What would I want to do if I knew I had only 10 years to live?”
“What would I do if I knew I had only 1 year to live?” and so on down to just a day to live. Focuses the mind!
What you’ll find – it will be no surprise – is that the shorter the time period, the more you’ll focus on people, not places or experiences.
4 – Having enriching experiences doesn’t mean you have to streak naked through the town centre or jump out of a plane every day. It simply means appreciating the little moments of joy we ALL have in each day. Need I say more? Live in the moment as much as you can!
5 – Kim shared this: “You don’t know how long you have left, and that’s only genuinely driven home when the reality of that actually hits you for real. It becomes a wake up call rather than a set of words we all joyfully bandy about. Don’t therefore live each day as if it were your last, but instead live each day to its fullest and with joy, love and gratitude for the people and the world about you, and the opportunities that they bring for love, laughter, work, beauty, and for doing the things that you love doing.
6 – And finally, this, from Lisa, is brilliant: Instead of a “Bucket List”, choose to have a “Lived List”. “We should be living our lives and soaking up the treasured memories they will give us. Not worrying about when we will die and ticking things off a list. Just live and enjoy your lived list.”
So, kick your bucket list, soak in the view, enjoy each precious moment of your weekend!
This week I discovered banana pancakes. 2 ingredients – 1 banana, 2 eggs. I added a little vanilla extract and cinnamon to the ‘batter’. Simply blend and pour small quantities onto a griddle. The flipping is the trickiest bit. I have since been advised to grill the top side to avoid flipping altogether.
They were, quite simply, delicious. I ate mine with blueberries and coconut chips. Highly recommend you try them if you haven’t done so already!
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“Why we need to STOP asking ‘Can Women Have It All’ on Psychologies Life Labs